Here I am, running on a whole whopping three hours of sleep from last night. The feeling is almost as bad as waking up for a 7 am class after a night out at the bars. Oh to be in college again.
But why did I get only three hours of sleep last night, you ask? Well because right when I was all snugged up in my fluffy pillow cloud of a bed and extra thick duvet cover, I felt something funny. Something was in the bed. The poodle child was asleep by my feet, per usual, and my first reaction was she must have brought something into the bed, because I can feel it on my foot. So I reposition my foot to try to move whatever object this may be and then realize I'm completely wrong in this assumption. Something was crawling on my foot and I could feel it. It wasn't just on the bed, it was on me.
That's when I leaned over to the night stand and grabbed my trusty iPhone with it's trusty little flash light and shined it in my bed. All that could be heard next was a terrifying screetch loud enough to wake Chris up, followed by a jump out of the bed.
There was a frucking roach. In my bed. Crawling on my foot.
And then I died.
Okay maybe I didn't, otherwise I wouldn't be here writing a blog post dedicated to a damn roach, but close enough.
Needless to say, it took me a while to get back in bed, and once I did, I didn't sleep the rest of the night. It made the Orange is the New Black episode with the bad storm where everyone slept on the floor almost seem like a pleasant accommodation.
I slept in a true one eye open fashion while feeling like something was crawling on me the rest of the night. Imagination is a strange thing.
One last thing. Everything really is bigger in Texas.
Have you ever had an uninvited crawler on you or in your bed?